Alternate Meanings for Common Words
Firearm & Gun Forum - FireArmsTalk.com > General Discussion Forums > The Club House > Alternate Meanings for Common Words

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-05-2013, 09:09 PM   #1
FTF_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Daoust_Nat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Orlando,Florida
Posts: 2,105
Liked 1227 Times on 600 Posts
Likes Given: 74

Default Alternate Meanings for Common Words

For entertainment purposes only. I've done no - zero - jack squat - due diligence on this to check to see if it's authentic but some of the answers are great.

The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.

And the winners are:

Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.
Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp.
Gargoyle, n. An ancient Chinese olive-flavored mouthwash.
Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by paving machinery.
Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.
Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men

__________________

A bad day at the range is better then a good day on the job!

Daoust_Nat is offline  
3
People Like This 
Reply With Quote

Join FirearmsTalk.com Today - It's Free!

Are you a firearms enthusiast? Then we hope you will join the community. You will gain access to post, create threads, private message, upload images, join groups and more.

Firearms Talk is owned and operated by fellow firearms enthusiasts. We strive to offer a non-commercial community to learn and share information.

Join FirearmsTalk.com Today! - Click Here


Old 08-05-2013, 10:34 PM   #2
Moderator
FTF_MODERATOR.png
Feedback Score: 1 reviews
 
robocop10mm's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Austin,Texas, by God!!
Posts: 10,081
Liked 2742 Times on 1436 Posts
Likes Given: 231

Default

ROFLOL!!! Thanks. I needed a good laugh.

__________________

In life, strive to take the high road....It offers a better field of fire.
"Robo is right" Fuzzball

robocop10mm is offline  
 
Reply With Quote
Old 08-05-2013, 11:06 PM   #3
RIP my good and faithful dog.
FTF_MODERATOR.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
winds-of-change's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Northern Illinois
Posts: 22,925
Liked 7118 Times on 4285 Posts
Likes Given: 8645

Default

VERY FUNNY. I laughed until I could barely breathe.

__________________
Honor Student: School of Hard Knocks
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
Quando Omni Flunkus Moritatus
winds-of-change is online now  
 
Reply With Quote
Old 08-05-2013, 11:07 PM   #4
Mommy, who lights the sun?
FTF_LIFETIMESUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
Balota's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Glenpool, Oklahoma
Posts: 2,947
Liked 1947 Times on 1184 Posts
Likes Given: 2121

Default

That was from the Washington Post. Here's some more in a similar vein.

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.


Here are the winners:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.



2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.

3. Intaxicaton: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realise it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone ( n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor ( n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

__________________

Balota
"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed." 2nd Amendment to the Constitution of the United States
Practice does NOT make perfect. Practice makes permanent. Only perfect practice makes perfect.

Check out 4th FTF Shoot & Hoot.http://www.firearmstalk.com/forums/f138/4th-ftf-shotgun-shoot-hoot-vanzant-mo-oct-4-5-2014-a-105142/

Balota is offline  
 
Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-2013, 12:14 AM   #5
Concealed Carry Instructor
FTF_SUPPORTER.png
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
 
AR10's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Lincoln Nebraska
Posts: 2,037
Liked 956 Times on 627 Posts
Likes Given: 229

Default

This thread is gay. lol

__________________
AR10 is offline  
 
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Firearms Forum Replies Last Post
Cheapest ballistics gel alternate SRK97 DIY Projects 4 05-07-2013 01:54 PM
Gun Control Laws: Where Common Sense Is Not So Common, an Officer’s Perspective gunnut07 Legal and Activism 9 08-05-2012 08:39 PM
Alternate Energy & Fuels MobileMarine The Club House 18 06-26-2012 08:53 PM
Homeland Security signs - their real meanings zhuk The Club House 3 10-19-2009 11:34 AM
An excellent alternate weapon Mark F Other Weapons 25 04-01-2009 05:00 AM