[Tony Soprano]

2008 Democratic National Convention Schedule of

Events:



7:00 pm ~ Opening flag burning



7:15 pm ~ Pledge of Allegiance to the U. N.



7:20 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



7:25 pm ~ Nonreligious prayer and worship with

Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton



7:45 pm ~ Ceremonial tree hugging



7:55 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



8:00 pm ~ How I Invented the Internet - Al Gore



8:15 pm ~ Gay Wedding Planning - Barney Frank

presiding



8:35 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



8:40 pm ~ Our Troops are War Criminals - John Kerry



9.00 pm ~ Memorial service for Saddam and his sons

- Cindy Sheehan and Susan Sarandon



10:00 pm ~ 'Answering Machine Etiquette' - Alec

Baldwin



11:00 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



11:05 pm ~ Collection for the Osama Bin Laden

kidney transplant fund - Barbra Streisand



11:15 pm ~ Free the Freedom Fighters from

Guantanamo Bay - Sean Penn



11:30 pm ~ Oval Office Affairs - William Jefferson

Clinton



11:45 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



11:50 pm ~ How George Bush Brought Down the World

Trade Towers - Howard Dean



12:15 am ~ 'Truth in Broadcasting Award' -

Presented to Dan Rather by Michael Moore



12:25 am ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



12:30 am ~ Satellite address by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad



12:45 am ~ Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by

Nancy Pelosi



1:00 am ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



1:05 am ~ Coronation of Hillary Rodham Clinton



1:30 am ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast



1:35 am ~ Bill Clinton asks Ted Kennedy to drive

Hillary home

[SheGUN]

LMAO!!! Nice.........

[allmons]

I was laughing out loud - then I realized that 95% of it is absolutely true. The only error is that you forgot the Sarah Brady speech, "Why no one but the Government Gestapo - er, BATF - should have guns".

[cnorman18]

Absolutely f***ing priceless!

I suppose the mounting of the "GUN FREE ZONE" sign by Rosie O'Donnell's armed bodyguards will take place before the convention actually begins...